Days like today are simply no fun. I woke up after a night of not sleeping, grouchy as can be and the day didn't do me any favors. Spilled my coffee all over my desk, got some crappy emails that made me want to scream into a pillow, and accomplished only a smattering of the many items on my to do list. Cried on the way to the barn out of frustration with my inability to pull it together after eight hours, other than a solid workout, which was much needed.
I arrived at the sanctuary of the barn, working hard to hold back more tears and clear my mind so I could focus on the task at hand. Tacked up, things are good, then BAM! The straw the breaks the camel's back. A barn crab down the aisle asks me if I intend to listen to the music loud enough to hear it while I ride. Really?!?! No, I was hoping to turn it up just loud enough to piss you off and annoy anyone else who hates Miranda Lambert, but not loud enough to keep me company. Of course, I didn't say that. I said, "Oh, is it too loud now?" They replied, "Never mind, it's fine" (a lie). I said, "Oh, no! never mind!" and turned it off and went into the indoor and lost it. Poor Abbey was a tissue.
I was just so angry. What is wrong with people? granted, this person seems miserable most days, and just wants to be left alone. I suppose it doesn't kill me to be able to ride my horse without Miranda's company if it means that her time is how she wants it - quiet and alone. So, feeling even more rotten for being angry with a person who got the shit end of the stick health and disposition-wise, I suck it up and get on my pony.
She was wonderful. We had a really nice ride. I don't know if she knew that I needed it, but I am thankful for the ride none the less. Another gorgeous sunset, a chat with my mom who I miss a ton, some time with my husband watching Breaking Bad, painted my toenails, and got some writing and work done. I will say a prayer for forgiveness and patience tonight, and hope that I can say hello to my grouch and do it with a smile tomorrow. What does it hurt to be kind to someone who really needs it? I have to say, that without the barn and my horse therapy, I would not be able to pull myself out of a funk nearly as easily... easy for me, anyway. After all, everyone we meet is fighting a battle that we know nothing about. Hard to hold that in mind sometimes when you are fighting your own, but worth trying to do.